Naivety World

Early this month, I came across a blog and the writer had written her list of kinky things she’d like to try. I was impressed not just with what she wanted to try out, but also with her courage to pen them down. And so I reached deep within me to master the same level of courage but came just shy of my goal. Here I am anyway.

You see, as an avid reader and writer, I have a wild imagination and my list would probably make most give me a side eye. Because, even in today’s modern world, there’s still a lot of judgment when women talk openly about their sexual desires. I have experienced it firsthand so I know what I’m talking about. Fortunately, I do get random bursts of courage here and there and will fiercely defend a woman’s right to sexual liberation.

But I digress. Back to my bucket list which I am clearly hesitant to share. Is it because I don’t know exactly what I want? No. On the contrary, I know exactly what I want and it comes with a whole lot of trust, open communication, honesty and a couple other things, which I won’t get into right now. For me, sexual liberation isn’t just a concept I’ll find myself randomly talking about, it’s something to be lived and experienced.

Unfortunately for me, I’m not sure this is something I can get in the current dating pool especially in this country. A man will go through such lengths to get you and believe they are owed….recompense. But why sir, when it is you who upended my life? It’s hardly the best way to develop trust when your body becomes a bargaining chip. I have however recently discovered, it’s not just women who are afraid to date, but also men, though for entirely different reasons. This feels like a whole other “Dating Dilemma” conversation, so I’ll save it for another blog.

I’ve always believed that for two people to be together, for two people to truly connect, there needs to be something special between them. And that something special will probably not be something other people will understand. We connect with each other for different reasons and sometimes in weird circumstances, but trust always has to be there. And it has to go both ways. It can’t just be one person feeling it all while the other holds back. Because no matter how hard someone tries to hide their true intentions, they always come out in the end.

But I digress again. Blogging is much harder than storytelling for me, cause one thought merges into another and they refuse to be ignored. Urgh.

Anyway, I will not outwardly mention my kinks, but I do find myself drawn to Dominance, and a couple of things that would fall under BDSM. It’s however not something to be taken lightly. It’s not just about tying someone up or playing rough, or randomly telling someone what to do. It has its own set of practices and rules, like consent!! And if you’re not careful, it can lead to serious trauma, both physical and emotional.

That being said, I can’t stress enough the importance of research and communication when it comes to exploring kinks. Do not dive in headfirst without knowing what you’re getting into. Take the time to educate yourself, to understand the risks and boundaries involved because it’s not just about you, it’s also about your partner. If they’re not experienced or knowledgeable, things can go south pretty fast. Curiosity can only take you so far, do your homework.

In the end, a kinky bucket list is not just a list of things to do, but a personal adventure of self-discovery and exploration. It’s a reflection of our deepest desires, our wildest fantasies, and our most intimate yearnings. There’s no one-size-fits-all approach. What works for one person may not work for another. Each of us is unique, with our own set of likes, dislikes, and boundaries. But remember the importance of consent, respect, and mutual understanding. Kink and BDSM are built on a foundation of trust and communication, and it’s important to prioritize the well-being and comfort of all parties involved.

To those who may be curious about exploring kinks, take your time, do your research, and communicate openly with your partner. Trust your instincts, listen to your body, and above all else, prioritize safety and consent every step of the way.