Naivety World

This morning, on my way to work, I had one of those all too familiar experiences that make you wonder what’s wrong with some people. I was walking towards a matatu when I noticed a man watching me. From the corner of my eye, I saw him straighten up from where he had been leaning against another matatu, people watching. He didn’t hesitate, didn’t even second guess himself, he came straight at me with unnerving focus.

I swerved slightly to avoid his broad shoulders from hitting mine. And as he passed, he muttered something under his breath. I didn’t catch it. I didn’t want to. After too many encounters like these, you learn to block out unsavory comments, letting your mind filter them out so they don’t follow you into your future.

But as I sat in the Nissan, wedged between two strangers, I found myself thinking about him. I wondered what he’d gained from that tiny interaction. What was the point? What’s the point of seeing a random stranger minding their own business and deciding to interact with them in the most negative way possible? I really don’t get it.

Reminds me of this series I was watching. It was so bad I couldn’t stop watching it. And in this series, there’s a man who represents pure evil and a woman who, despite being an atheist, represents good. One episode is about a young boy , who is almost turning 18, facing a court decision. The woman’s testimony could have the boy tried as a juvenile, giving him a chance at changing his life. The man wanted the boy tried as an adult and sent to maximum security prison, where he’d face the worst of the worst.

When the woman confronted the man, asking why he would want to destroy a boy with so much potential, the man’s response was chilling. He explained that sending the boy to prison would break him. Years of abuse would harden him, turning him into someone who had nothing but hatred and no hope for humanity, someone who would become a villain, inflicting hurt and pain. Can you imagine that!!!

Fortunately, the woman outsmarted him and won. 

Aside from the obvious entertainment, movies and series teach a lot. And that interaction stuck with me because it reflects something we all face, that is, moments that could turn us bitter, angry, even cruel. It’s tempting to lean into that villain arc, to think, “let the world feel my pain.” It even sounds cool in theory. But life isn’t a movie, and the choice to hold on to your humanity is far harder than it looks on screen.

Women, especially, have more than enough reasons to turn against men. We face so much every day. The daily microaggressions, the entitled behavior, the casual interruptions when we speak, the unwelcome “compliments” that feel more like threats, the sense of ownership some men seem to believe they have over our space, our time, even our bodies, urgh, it’s a constant fight to protect our peace. It’s honestly exhausting and dehumanizing. And It’s so tempting to want men to feel even a fraction of what they put us through, for them to experience the discomfort, fear and frustration they cause, intentional or not. There’s a kind of poetic justice in imagining the roles reversed.

And yet, we don’t let that bitterness take root.

The truth is, Mungu halali. God doesn’t sleep. There are quiet moments of divine intervention, little blessings that remind you who you are. It might be a kind stranger, a prayer answered, or a sudden wave of strength you didn’t know you had. Sometimes, you look back and realize you don’t even remember how you got through something that was meant to break you. And through it all, you still have your compassion and your humanity, despite everything.

Maybe, that’s the real victory, not letting the world turn us into what it wants us to be, but choosing, every day, to be a little better, a little kinder, and have a little more hope. Because in the end, those small choices pull us from the edge.